This is a post about the wankers at the BRDC (Bellends Ruining Drivers with Contracts).

Firstly, let's not forget that Silverstone’s main thing going for it is that it’s old. It’s like saying that we should probably replace Stormzy with old Cliff records on loop. Silverstone is flat, muddy, has bad parking and is called Silverstone. Stupid. Donnington imploded and since it last hosted a race Brands Hatch has shrunk to be about 30cm square so is no longer suitable for F1.

Therefore Silverstone should be onto a winner, history and ubiquity mean that there isn’t really another choice for F1 - and we need a British GP as basically all the teams live here and so does Murray Walker.

This all seemed to be apparent in 2009 when the BRDC (Ballbag Rutting Damon's Corns) signed a deal that would keep the British GP at silverstone until 2027 - from a BBC article at the time:

“The contract on the table was believed to demand a £12m fee for 2010, with an increase of 7% per year after that. However, it is now understood the increase has been pegged at 5%. There is also a clause in the contract that allows either side to end the contract after 10 years.”

They never had any intention of going further than ten years! I’ll bet that they worked out Bernie would be dead by then and they could appeal to the new owners who would see how ridiculous a 5% increase each year is. It’s a 17 year contract - 5% more each year is 85% - don’t check my maths.

And they were almost right. Bernie is gone and Liberty are in charge but let’s not forget they also quite like 5% of extra free money each year especially as, even though Bernie would take the money from your pocket he’d do it whilst maintaining eye contact, shaking your hand and somehow with your full agreement.

And to time their divorce announcement to be the week before the Grand Prix and then have people like Derek Warwick be really shitty every time asked about it and basically saying look how great the race is why don’t you all fuck off of course they’ll sign means that the official FF1S line is fucking bin Silverstone.

Don't worry, I have a solution

But Terry, I hear you cry, where should we conduct a race, would the streets of London really work?

No, course not, won’t ever happen. Instead we need to think laterally, what with Brexit happening we need an advert to the world that we are open for business. Therefore I say we tour old Empire countries - the British GP in Australia, in Canada, in India. No. Wait. THE FUCKING FALKLANDS. That’ll show them, with a bonus GP in Gibrlatar.